I wonder if we all had the ability to truly be in each others minds and in each others hearts; would there be such great interpersonal conflict at times of mis understanding and dispute? I believe that if we deeply understood each other for who we were and where we came from there would be far less dispute between both groups and individuals. At times of extreme and internal emotional fluctuations we often detach from peacefulness of being and generally become quite murky within the depths of our minds and hearts. This is largely because as human beings we struggle at times of emotional difficulty to detach from this very personal experience. Our minds and hearts become cloudy and distressed and we have no real concept or reference point of what being empathetic, compassionate and understanding actually is.
When we experience any emotion at intensity and perhaps at its self-perceived peak it is initially difficult to move away from that emotion for too long a period of actual time (key word: initially). So when we disengage from this emotional experience we move through internalised dissonance (with what we want and what we are actually experiencing) whilst simultaneously disengaging from those around us, this can have a tremendously negative effect on our interpersonal relationships and even the way we feel about our own selves. Every human person displays this in different forms, the common thread amongst all of these forms though is the difficulty found in communicating with those in which we care about, love, admire and respect. We often forget about our personal and interpersonal history with others, we forget about the goodness which surrounds us and has surrounded us in the past. This is saddening and more importantly it places the individual out of control of themselves.
There is a vast difference with being emotional and being emotional with no deeper understanding of one’s surroundings. Please take the time to understand these processes and look further within yourself. Here is a starting point. When you have a ‘falling out’ or sincere dispute or separation with a loved one how do you act/react, how do you behave, what are your thought processes, does your emotional being fluctuate? There is no judgement here, there are no standards to adhere by, simply observe yourself and your actions and reactions. By engaging in this integral process of self reflection we actually and automatically engage in empathetic practice. This empathetic practice places life circumstance in to a clearer perspective and allows us to choose from a vantage point of clarity rather than anger or confusion. When we connect with circumstance and when we connect with ourselves we bridge the vast gap between ourselves and the other. By doing this we somewhat eliminate the problem of two separate minds and merge our realities through the power of compassion and empathy. SS.